Something Different

A while ago I told myself I would never write a blog again. Guess that didn't stick. I made this decision because while some people seem to be able to analyze the world with the perfect blend of truth, humor, cynicism, and grammar, I do not share their gift. I take the world FAR too seriously, but I guess you have to play to your strengths.

I never really wanted to blog about my faith. Most Christians blog about politics or controversial "Christian" topics. To me my faith is a deeply personal and emotional matter. While some people love to debate the existence of Christ or the theological importance of TULIP, I just don't. Jesus didn't win me over by explaining how I'd get to Heaven in detail, but if he had, that would definitely be something to blog about. No, I became a Christian 11 and a half years ago because I felt lost, isolated and confused. Ironically, while Jesus has changed a lot of things in my life I've gotten to a similar question again, "What am I doing with my life?" This is probably quite normal for a 24-year-old. I think we all go through it at one stage or another. But sitting, unemployed, two years out of college, in my bed at 6 in the morning, having a mild anxiety attack made me think, "the only thing I can think to do right now is read the bible."

I read Eat, Pray, Love two years ago and loved it. And similarly, I feel like I've gotten to that point where I'm crying out to God. But for me His answer wasn't "go back to bed", instead it was, "come talk to me." So after doing that for the past 30 minutes, I decided to write it down. I'm not going to blog out my thoughts. The last thing I want to do is add to the world my anxieties and fears. No. I thought I'd share what I read. Share what I meditated on. And hopefully, if someone else out there gets helped, that's great. If not, it sure helped me to sit down and think long enough to write all this out.

Day 1

6:31 AM British Standard Time

Leicester, England, UK

What I read:

Psalm 1

New International Version (NIV)

Biblegateway.com

¹ Blessed is the one

who does not walk in step with the wicked
or stand in the way that sinners take
or sit in the company of mockers,
² but whose delight is in the law of the LORD,
and who meditates on his law day and night.
³ That person is like a tree planted by streams of water,
which yields its fruit in season
and whose leaf does not wither—
whatever they do prospers.

⁴ Not so the wicked!
They are like chaff
that the wind blows away.
⁵ Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment,
nor sinners in the assembly of the righteous.

⁶ For the LORD watches over the way of the righteous,
but the way of the wicked leads to destruction.

What I meditated on:

Verses 1-3

The difference between "walk in step", "stand in the way", and "sit"

There is only one tree in the tropics that blooms all year long, according to Planet Earth. The fig tree. Loads of animals fight over it and live in it. But since a lot of trees don't bloom regularly it is a consistent source of nourishment that they can always cling to when all the other trees are risky.

My prayer:

Jesus, show me your stream so that I can be a good and consistent source of fruit

How I feel:

This blog should be renamed, Contemplations of an Unemployed Bum.